Homunculus
“Fuck you. You’ve never accomplished anything worthwhile. Hit yourself in the head. You are a coward. Why don’t you try to improve yourself? Don’t try anything. The world is going to hell and you need to fix it. You have no friends. Just sit and watch more TV. Someone else would do this better than you. Smoke cigarettes. You’re wasting your talent. Surf the internet instead. There is too little payoff for the insane amount of work you will have to put in. It’s too hard. Your art sucks. If you keep smoking you’ll die. You talk too much. You’re bald, but not in a nice Picard way. You’re destroying the environment. Do you know how many things you’ve left uncompleted? Cut yourself with a knife. You’re falling behind. You’re sexually inadequate. Let’s think everything through before making a decision. You fail to do anything you put your mind to. They’re laughing at you. You’re a bad friend. Nobody is reading what you write. You’re too tired to do anything meaningful. You have Aspergers Syndrome. Why can’t you understand? It’s stupid so don’t do it. If they know the real you, they won’t like it. Now that you’ve identified the necessary steps, completing it is too boring.
You are so derivative. Why don’t you tell someone how you feel? Don’t tell anyone anything, they won’t understand. You look ugly. You have cancer, probably in your stomach, you just don’t know it yet. You will never be a success. They’re going to fire you. Smoke all the weed. You’re worthless. You don’t actually feel anything. No one supports you. It’s unoriginal. Smoke crystal meth. You are alone. Drink Drink Drink Drink. Society is organized the wrong way. Why do you keep sabotaging yourself? You have no faith in yourself. Don’t finish what you started, give up on it. This is not a good time to start. It’s too much work. Your skills as a programmer have deteriorated so badly you will never find another job. You’re permanently damaged goods. You will fail if you try. You are not worth loving. You don’t like anybody. Your wife will leave you. Everyone’s going to laugh at you. You are unmanly. Kill yourself. Drink and drive. I hate you. You’re depressed. Nobody likes you. That’s too hard. You’re too much like your Mom. You’re too much like your Dad. Your dreams are unachievable. Shut up. You can’t write. You haven’t really changed ever. If you keep drinking you’ll die.
You’re stupid. Life is miserable. Procrastinate instead. No one understands or cares what you are saying. What’s the point anyway? If you don’t succeed you’re worthless. Nobody cares about you or what you have to say. You’ve already done that, it’s repetitive. Don’t go to sleep. You’re a horrible parent. You aren’t participating in the conversation the right way. You’re doing it wrong. Cut off all your fingers with a knife. Quit. You’re overweight. Do something easier. Don’t even try.”