What the Fuck is Going on?
Our dear friend Vlad has decided to depart the world of singledom. In order to mourn the passing its our duty to give the man one last hurrah! It’s going to be an all day affair, and you can join us for all of it, or only one or two events; whatever works. Please RSVP by (commenting below; email: email@example.com; twitter: feelingsofwhite). Here are the details:
When the Fuck does this all start?
You don’t have to be anywhere at 10am, but anyone who’d like to drop off a car or change of clothes at my pad prior to the bicycle ride can do so. Alternatively, you can leave your bicycle at my place after the BBQ, come by Sunday and pick it up.
Vlad & I will meet up and my pad and ets it to the meet-up point. Come one come all anytime after 10am, but if you show up after we leave there won’t be anyone around until 2 or 3pm.
We’re Fucking Bicycling From Where?
Yeah bitches! Get your bicycle on. We’re going to meet at the Butterdome on the University campus. From there we will go for a two hour peddle through the river valley and back to my place out in the west end. We’re aiming for a nice enjoyable ride, not a hellish work out (case in point: I will be bicycling)
The great thing about this locale is that you can catch a bus or lrt and take your bicycle with you to meet on campus. (There are no bike restrictions on ets on Saturdays). If you need help navigating ets, check out their Edmonton transit website; I find the whole-city-at-a-glance system map very helpful. Just remember we won’t be returning to the UofA campus, but we will end on Whyte. So if you are somehow sober at the end of it all: then for shame! shame on you! (but you could drive if you left your car near whyte/campus)
We meet a the Butterdome [115 St & 87 Ave] at noon. Text (or call) my cell (780-916-6983) if you need to get a hold of the group (e.g. “I’m at the yellow building? Where the fuck are you?”) If addresses confuse you, the UofA website has a map; check out quadrant G3.
Vlad’s got our route all plotted out on google maps if you’d like’re curious.
|Bike Rentals:||I called around and found only one guy who’d rent bicycles. Before he’d even admit his or his company’s name he asked me “are you calling from a collection agency?” He says for $25 he’ll rent you a bike and drop it off / pick it up from locations of your choice. But he wants your credit card so proceed at your own risk. (Instant Mountain Bike Rentals, 780-905-6066)|
|Remember:||You can drop a change of clothes at my place pre-ride, or just carry ’em in a backpack/saddlebag. We start the ride at the Butterdome and we end the ride at my place.|
Where the Fuck is James’ Place?
After the ride we shall briefly retire to the Casa de James. Bikers can shower up at my place and we’ll get there when we’ll get there. For weaklings not up to the physical challenge, come by after 3pm.
Pound back a few beers while we’ll throw down a poker game or two. There’ll be some video games up in the losers lounge. Come supper we’ll burn a few burgers and steaks. I’ve got a fire pit so anyone who’d rather cook smokies over beautiful glorious raw fire can get their pyro on.
cost: $30 for steak, beers and a taxi to Hudson’s. If you aren’t drinking taxis or catching a beer then talk to me about paying less. But any overages are going towards getting Vlad drunk later and helping him buy drinks for pretty girls, so it’s for a good cause ;)
I live at 20519 - 91 Ave. I’m at the south-east corner of that intersection. Google maps can’t really find my place, but this link will get you pretty close to where I live. The map embedded to your left is your best guide.
Where the Fuck The Party At?
Are you too busy drinking alone to make it to the barbeque? Well then you’d better at least stumble your way to Hudsons on Whyte [10307 Whyte (82nd) Ave]. Again, text (or call) my cell (780-916-6983) if you need to get a hold of the group (e.g. “I’m at Hudsons? Where the fuck are you?”)
We have reservations, so saying “I’m with Vlad’s Bachelor Party” should get you in (before 10.30pm). If you’re coming with the barbeque people, we’ll get there when we get there. If you’re meeting us there, we’ll be there by 9pm.
Now there’s a crazy idea that we may take a walk down Whyte at some point, moving the party to O’Byrnes (assuming we can stumble that far). I’m not going to pretend that I can predict what a group of horney drunken louts such as ourselves will actually be doing this late in the evening, but if your trying to meet up with us past 11pm, we may have moved: send me a text message to discover where we at. (pls txt; you don’t think I’m going to be able to hear a phone call at a bar, do you?)
Thank you for reading all the way to the end. As my way of saying thank you, here is a nice pair of boobs: